- it's quite unclear as to what emotions the characters are feeling from just a few long shots,
- the text sometimes blocks things such as faces,
- the black screen doesn't create enough dramatic tension,
- we connect and reach the target audience quite well,
- we manage to tell the story effectively without dialogue.
In our next draft we will...
- include more close up shots and mid shots in order to communicate the emotions well,
- make sure all titles are added in suitable places but are still legible and easy to read,
- make sure things are able to be seen well on screen (for example the map on the phone),
- change the length of the black screen to make it a bit more dramatic,
- try and make the cross-cutting effect easier on the eye and look better.
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